I was trying to be fair. Let's just say both of our feelings got the best of us. I did not want to be dating someone lying to me.... or struggling with something I was unaware of. If you notice that your partner seems to be exhibiting signs that your partner isn't over their ex, the first thing you should do is check in with yourself about the relationship, Vossenkemper said. I knew there was a difference between wanting to be with someone and wanting to move on but still processing feelings and emotions. EMAIL. She refused to stop talking to her ex and wanted her in her life. I've met the guy once, and she no longer sees him in person, but she is friends with him on Facebook. Dealing with her ex and helping her get over her was triggering in a lot of ways. She still has pictures of her in her childhood room from when they were friends. I’m telling you this, not to alarm you but to prepare you. I was so incredibly sad and I felt my BPD triggered. I told her I respected her needs and what she needed but I could not do this. We spend a lot of time together, I'd say 3-4 afternoons a week, and we always have a great time. Some honest advice. Shortly after our fight, we remained friends and focused on our friendship. It means high levels of sensitivity. If your partner gets emotional or upset when talking about their ex, or is still in regular contact with their ex, you might feel particularly triggered over this issue. Since then we have moved forward a lot. When your girlfriend is still thinking about her ex, she won't be open to receiving affection from anyone else. more: The Top Signs You’re Not Over Your Ex So when you think about it, the harder your ex seems to be trying to move on, the more likely it is that he’s actually not over you – and that he actually has strong feelings for you. She has been learning how to support me when I have a flare up, and she wants to be with me and support me - which is hard to me to believe. If your boyfriend, girlfriend, or ex is playing this game with you, get out. #1 She’s distant and confused. Let's just say both of our feelings got the best of us. Seeing social media posts by them was hurtful. Things were going pretty well. She started crying and begging me not to leave. Naked Girlfriend Photos See more: girlfriend’s naked body naked girlfriend naked girlfriend pics my ex girlfriend naked my naked girlfriend girlfriend… I knew it would take time to get over her ex. … If you want to get over him, get present to all the things that didn’t work in the relationship and get excited to discover all the great things a new relationship can bring into your life. I did not know how extensive her relationship with her ex was. Watching who you spend time with, where you’re going in your free time, and how you’re holding on after the breakup are just a few signs of interests of a pretending ex-partner. All my other relationships were one sided - the significant other always had stronger feelings than I had for them. Press J to jump to the feed. I wonder if she runs into her ever and does not tell me. I’m Happy For Them. I told her I needed space. I did not realize the extensive relationship and complication of the relationship she had with her ex. By Nikki Vee. Basically, this is a disorder in which you have trouble processing your emotions. The other day I found an article about how it is okay to miss your ex in order to move on or process your past.... and she said thank you... but even this made me feel horrible. Yeah. It challenges me to deal my emotions in a healthy way. #1 She’s distant and confused. EMAIL. Alright to get ready to brace yourself for a very long post. If you notice that your partner seems to be exhibiting signs that your partner isn't over their ex, the first thing you should do is check in with yourself about the relationship, Vossenkemper said. She doesn't still speak with him, aside from occasional casual comments on Facebook. It makes me feel unimportant. Just because of the way things ended it was uncomfortable. I knew her last relationship was a bit rough, but I did not know the details of what that meant. Your Crazy Ex Girlfriend. We had this conversation several times about how it made me upset and how it was triggering to my mental well being... and ultimately how I could not handle my girlfriend continuing her relationship with her ex. We're both 21 and in school. It was from her ex, I asked him to not message her and to respect our relationship. I told her it would be hard to mend a relationship with her ex and work on a new relationship with me at the same time. Probably a little too fast. If you know she isn't completely over the ex, definitely proceed with caution for your sake and hers. Nothing kills the joy of a relationship like that nagging feeling that your boo still isn't totally over his or her ex. Ex’s are ex’s for a reason right? I was never in love with them truly. https://www.developattraction.com/girlfriend-not-over-ex-boyfriend It just feels horrible from time to time. It means trouble dealing with intense emotions. I was trying to that she was trying.. this was hard for her too. If You Want To Have A Good Time With Your Ex-Girlfriend. This allegedly happened to Blac Chyna, which is why she went off on Tyga via Snapchat. I choose to believe that what I see in my ex's social media photos is not the whole truth. But it's too late now, I already made that decision, for better or worse. I was trying to see people are not perfect. Thanks reddit! In the end, dodging the ex drama is all about good old-fashioned communication, and it’s especially important when trying to determine if she’s over him or not. I saw a hurtful conversation about how she would always choose her ex over me (from when we first had our initial fight). So, we started dating again. It only took a few days for my 'girlfriend' to come around and want to make things work. Your Reaction. I empathathized in a way. i told her I looked in her phone. Girlfriend isn't over her ex? She was the one to end their relationship, and he's still not over her. I honestly don't know what it's like to be hung up over someone like that. 14 subtle signs your girlfriend is not over her ex yet! It hurts to think about your ex. I've met the guy once, and she no longer sees him in person, but she is friends with him on Facebook. The Face You Make When Your Ex Text You. I realize relationships are really hard and some struggles take time. by David Braucher, L.C.S.W., Ph.D. This was the first time I connected to someone who also mutually connected to me. Posted Oct 18, 2013 . It’s likely your ex meant what they said, but meant it … Even though this may have been an evasion of privacy, I did not regret it. We have only been dating for three months, but she is putting in effort. This Is My Ex . Why Can’t I Get Over My Ex? I would be lying to say this is something I don't struggle with. Breakups can be tough, and often times the negative feelings that you and your ex might experience can last a while, as wounds can take time to heal. This is my first serious relationship. Your ex just wants it to be true. Not letting go of a former love may help us hold on to our loving selves. I knew she still had unresolved feelings with her ex by the way she talked about this relationship. You have trouble trusting people - and most of the issues are revealed in relationships. But as a result, this has effected our relationship a lot. Write all the things that you didn't like about your ex. Need help with your relationship? She even wished her a Happ Thanksgiving - at that point, a text she sent her a few days before. However, if our girlfriend is still talking to her ex-boyfriend that is most likely going to brew up some trouble. But if he is happy and is over you, then he has no reason to try and make you feel jealous. If something like this ever happened again - where she was talking to this girl or texting her or doing something and not telling me about it - that I was going to end things. Eesh, going into this relationship knowing that she wasn't over him even after a year probably wasn't the best idea. The odd and ironic thing is that playing this game could represent a mental health issue. My [29M] ex girlfriend [23F] keeps spoiling Game of Thrones for me. Like I said something right from the beginning... but I feel like I can't trust her. Here's how. TWEET. At one point her ex even lashed out at her and empathized for what I must be feeling. I just don't know what to do. After a breakup, it can be excruciating to deal with all of this, but, before doing anything rash — like sliding into your ex's DMs — you should consider what's going on behind the scenes. She’s blocked me on everything, but briefly unblocks me every Monday to send me Game of Thrones spoilers before I can [watch] it. Hilda Burke, a psychotherapist and couples counsellor shares her advice on how to get over a cheating ex once and for good. Face up to the pain. This Is Why Your Ex Has Moved On And You're Still Not Over The Breakup. According to experts, this is what regrets after a breakup might really mean. Somebody is willing to be with me and support my mental health - even when I may be difficult to deal with. Well, that didn't really happen. We needed to break up. I just don't know how much is too much and I wanted others' thoughts on the whole situation. Her photograph still has pride of place on his wall. So as you can imagine, dating someone has been challenging for me in numerous ways. My Girlfriend’s Naked Body. 0. I also knew getting rid of her on social media and getting rid of things like her number were things she needed to do on her own time. Shares. Even though I did not want to be their friends, I still saw them at college during the semester in passing sometimes. If your EX girlfriend cheated on you, then this article was not for you, and you instead need my article on how to get your ex back. Not letting go of a former love may help us hold on to our loving selves. Posted Oct 18, 2013 . SHARE. We haven't spoken about her feelings towards her ex since we started, but I have a feeling that they're still there. You Tell Her It’s Over. I know part of it is the BPD and my insecurities really coming in... or getting triggered. The second sign your ex is merely pretending to be over you is when he or she goes the extra mile to prove so. What really upset me, was there was conversation after this... in which she lied to me. Hello I have a question, my girlfriend I had been in jail for over a year now. She warned me when we started this that she wasn't over him, we agreed to take it slow and I promised myself I'd be cautious with my emotions. Though often fun, love is not a game. I think I want to give her more time. So, that day we talked. Since your ex cares about you, your ex is going to give away subtle signs of pretending to be over you whether he or she likes it or not. It's like living with phantom limb syndrome. Jesus. Often, when someone is in the middle of the emotional turmoil following a breakup, every memory brings pain and it feels like the only option is to try to either totally forget about the other person or stop caring altogether and we call that 'getting over someone'. He would be bragging about his new lady. 95 COMMENTS. So, we basically got back together. Unfortunately, a big part of BPD is trust and feeling like everyone will abandon them. It’s not rude, it’s not passive-aggressive and it’s not a bad idea. 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